Having parents who don't know I'm gay.

Well.

Let's start with the fact that I'm 100% sure they're ok with homosexuality and 80% sure they'll be ok with me being gay. So not many worries there. But lately, there's just been a lot of conversations and advice given that is just so directed towards the preconception that everyone is straight that I've had to hold back a laugh more than once.

Let's start with things my dad has said. Which is very minimal mind you, since he's usually at work. Anyways, a couple weeks ago, he told me that marrying a smart girl is crucial to the success and health of both me and my future kids. In conclusion he told me to find a girl like my mom to marry. Talk about an Oedipus complex. Ew. Needless to say I said that my mother really wasn't my type. Or the gender, but I didn't say that out loud.

Let's not forget the mixed signals my prom sent to my parents. My friends all knew I wasn't straight so when I asked a girl everyone knew we were going as friends. But of course my parents get on my back whether or not I like her for her hair, her eyes, her complexion, her personality... I just replied that I liked her for who she was. But that wasn't all. I accidentally let slip that she was going the same university and the same program as me. The torrential downpour of "is she the one" type of questions that ensued made me wish I moved out a month ago. Funny nonetheless.

More recently, I was stuck eating lunch with my mom (which I usually don't mind). However this lunch she insisted on watching this Korean dating show. Faaaaaantastic. She tells me to watch closely to learn what kind of "techniques" I need to pick up chicks. Not that I like guys or anything. Or the fact that I'm seeing someone already. But I let her continue. On and on asking what girls were my type and stuff. I'm glad I was hungry because I finished my lunch really quick so I could laugh about the situation in solitude.

Oh, did I mention that they can't wait for grandchildren?